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Recently I sent an e-mail to Get Busy Living subscribers asking what questions I could answer for them to help them with anything they’re struggling with. I got a bigger response than I expected and got great questions that I know many more people are struggling with.

So I’m going to get to al the questions. Some will be in one article by itself, others will be together, and some I’ll answer privately if I feel that is best.

I left out names to provide anonymity and also made any changes to spelling or grammar if needed.

Today’s question is one that is very common and that’s why I want to answer it first. This is the biggest problem I read about and I know the feeling because I went through this in my life.

How to feel ‘unstuck’ in life? I want to make various changes (job, relationships, own self) but I just don’t know where to even start to begin living the best life I can/could.

This is the most popular question I get so thank you for asking.

My advice is from my own experience. I know what that feeling is like. I know the unhappiness and frustration to feel stuck. I will share what helped me finally get unstuck in life.

I hope you’re at a point where you’re willing to do whatever it takes. That means trying new things. That means getting out of your comfort zone. That means doing things differently. That also means having an open mind to take in advice from different sources then trying it for yourself.

There’s nothing worse than someone thinking they know it all and being stubborn. If they did, then why are they stuck in life or running into the same problem over and over again?

Let me be honest about something. Change is hard. I get it. It’s not comfortable. It’s not easy and that’s why many people never live a fulfilling life. They live an average life full of regret. Because it’s hard, you’re going to want to give up a lot. There will be times when you wonder if it’s all worth the effort. I know I did. After thinking about it, I realized that I would be so upset with myself I didn’t keep trying. I was doing the right things, but not seeing results yet. But I believed in the process and the journey.

To get unstuck in life, you must posses one important belief, motto, attitude, or mindset. Whatever you want to call it. Without this, nothing else I tell you will matter.

You have to take 100% responsibility for everything your life. That means the good and the bad. You have to stop complaining, blaming and pointing fingers. When you feel stuck, you also feel that this isn’t your fault. I know because that’s how I used to be. Nothing was my fault. How could it be when I followed everything I should do in life?

There’s one quote that I read that was a wake up call. I can’t remember who said it but it goes something like this.

If you don’t want the next five years of your life to be like the last five, you can’t keep doing the same old shit.

Do you want the next five years of your life to look like the last five? I know you don’t. Then what you’ve been doing has to change. You have to understand that. You can’t keep pointing the blame at people, feeling sorry for yourself, and spending 6 hours a night watching TV.

What has to change is you and much of your life.

I was 32 at the time when I read that quote. I had felt stuck for the majority of my 20’s. I always thought my 20’s would be a great decade. A time when I would discover my passion, work hard, make lots of money, buy a house and car. In my 30’s, I would get married and start a family.

It didn’t turn out like that. I was stuck in a restaurant job I hated. What was worse was that I had no idea what I wanted to do. I couldn’t quit my job because I had a mortgage, bills, and car payment to take care of. So I was stuck and I hated myself for being in that position with no way out.

So at 32, when I hit my rock bottom driving home from work one night, I wrote a letter to myself and wrote I was willing to do whatever it took because I didn’t want to keep waking up and going to sleep unhappy for the rest of my life.

I wanted to create the life of my dreams.

Of course I didn’t want the next five years of my life to be like the last five. I understood that I couldn’t keep doing what I was doing. I could not be the same person and expect my life to change the way I wanted. Old habits had to go. I had to starting building a new version of myself.

I thought to myself, “What I have been doing has gotten me to my lowest point in life. If I start doing the opposite of everything I have been doing, then I would be at the highest point in my life. Right?”

I know it sounds simple, but it made me understand that I needed a new approach. I wasn’t going to literally do the opposite of everything I was doing, but I understood the idea of having to do new and different things in my life.

If some expert said to jump ten times on one leg every morning while saying “I’m going to have a great day”, I would have tried it. I seriously was open to trying new ways of doing things if that was going to help me.

I knew I had to change a lot about myself if I wanted to get different results.

This was the second big discovery. Before in my 20’s my goal was to be happy. In order for me to feel happy, I wanted to find a new career. When I gave up trying to find a new career, I got interested in making money online.

Money was my key to happiness. That’s all I cared about.

If I could just make money online in anyway that allowed me to quit my job, I would be happy. Everything else would be amazing. I would have more confidence. I would fall in love. I would have more time to take care of myself and be more healthy.

I was so focused on getting the results I wanted (money) because I felt that would make me happy. That approach didn’t work cause I turned 30 years old and was more lost and confused in my life than when I turned 20.

Now I’m going to share what helped me finally change my life. It took me many years of feeling stuck and doing it the wrong way. So I hope my experience can help anyone who’s reading this.

To begin living the best life you can, you have to start with yourself. That is the only thing you can control right now. You can’t control when you’ll get into a new relationship nor can you control when you’ll get a new job.

But you can control what you do and what you think. That’s where I began and so should you.

I saw a TED talk by Shawn Achor. Highly recommend to watch it. Then if you want to learn more read his book called The Happiness Advantage.

I learned that I have to be happy first if I wanted to get the results I wanted in life. If I would have read that in my 20’s, I would have ignored it cause that’s wrong.

As a society, we’ve always been trying to achieve a goal in order to be happy in life. If we could make more money, have a new job, get married, or start a profitable business, then we would be happy.

I had been doing it all backwards. I finally understood that’s why I couldn’t achieve success.

When I say happy, don’t think it’s ignoring your problems and walking around with a smile on your face all day long. It’s about changing how you see the world through your habits, your attitude, your thoughts, and your actions.

The day after I hit my rock bottom and wrote a letter to myself, I began this new chapter in my life with a new mindset. I still had the same horrible job. I still had to go to it. I still hated driving to work and being there for even one minute. That part of my life wasn’t going to be changing any time soon unfortuatnely.

I started reading personal development books again to learn what successful people do.

One thing I started to do was a morning routine. A great book to learn more is The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. I also did a podcast interview with him.

I had never done a morning routine before, but I was willing to try something new. One part of the morning routine was to write in a gratitude journal. I had always read the benefits of a gratitude journal.

Even in my 20’s when I read personal development books thinking that reading books would without action would instantly change my life, I had read that I should be thankful. I thought that was stupid. How can I be thankful? I hated my life. What could I be thankful for? I had nothing that I could think of that I was thankful for. Instead I could go on and on about what I hated and what I wish I had in my life.

Now I was at a point in my life where I was open to trying new things. As you can see, I began doing a lot of things I hadn’t done before. I needed to if I wanted to get different results in my life.

As part of my morning, I would write down ten things I was thankful for. Simple things like having a bed to sleep in, having clean water to drink, having a paycheck even though I didn’t like my job, and being able to walk. We take these things for granted and overlook them and instead focus on what we wish we had in life.

I’ve written an article about starting a gratitude habit.

How this helps is that is starts shifting your mind to look for what’s good in life instead of what’s bad. It’s training your mind to see differently.

Another change I made was my health. I’m not suggesting that you need to completely change what you eat and join a gym. Even moderate activity a few times a week has physical and mental benefits. Something like a walk is all you need or any activity that gets your heart rate up and that you enjoy.

I decided to challenge myself to get healthy.

Since I graduated high school, I had always been up and down in terms of my health. I’d go months being in great shape and eating healthy and then many months eating junk food and not exercising.

In October 2011 when I hit rock bottom, I was in horrible shape. Who’s motivated to exercise and eat healthy when life sucks? I certainly wasn’t. I would eat to feel better. During my lunch break, I would go and get fast food, then come back and take a nap before starting the dinner shift. I would eat dinner often after 9pm when it slowed down. When I came home, I would sit in front of my computer with the TV on. I stay up till 1-2am. I woke up 9-10am and would be on the computer or watching TV until I had to drag myself to work again and repeat my day.

My clothes started feel more tight. I had less energy. I just felt crappy every day. So turning my health around was important to me. I knew what it was like to be physical fit. I felt great. I had more confidence and more energy.

Exercise plays in an important part in creating a more positive mind. A more positive mind allows us to get the results that we want in life because we start to see opportunities and answers that we’re seeking.

I did something crazy though. I signed up for a half marathon despite never running that distance. I knew if my plan was to just go to the gym, I would lose interest. I needed something tangible to work towards. A half marathon was a long distance but doable in my mind. I thought if I could run 13.1 miles without stopping then I would be in great physical shape. I followed a free training program I found online. My first week of running was difficult of course. As the weeks progress, I got stronger and my endurance improved.

I also found the more I did it, the easier it was to do. I was training in October, November and December. The coldest months in Florida. Waking up from my warm bed and going running in the cold mornings did not sound fun.

Once I got momentum going by sticking to my training, it was easy to get out of bed. I didn’t have to think about it. I didn’t come up with excuses why not go run. I actually looked forward to it.

Besides just exercising, I changed what I ate. Six days a week I would eat reasonably. No fried foods, no sweet, smaller portions, not too much processed foods. Even on my lunch break from work when I ate out, I would eat Chipotle often cause it was easy to get something healthy. Every Sunday was my cheat day. That was the day I would indulge in every craving I had. I would eat anything I wanted from morning till night. By the end of the day, I would be so full and look forward to the next day when I wouldn’t be eating so much. Doing that helped me stick with the other six days.

Three months after I began I completed my first half marathon. I remember the feeling when I was done. I had done something I never thought was possible. I felt like I could do anything now. I had so much confidence because I started as a beginner. I lost about 15 pounds in the process and physically and mentally felt great. I ended up doing another half marathon just two months later because it was fun.

My biggest goal in life that would make me happy wasn’t to lose 15 pounds, run a half marathon, have more energy during the day, or feel more confident. It was to make money online so I could quit my job. If you noticed I didn’t mention yet about my plans to do so. The old me would have immediately gone online to research the next money making opportunity. That’s what I did before and that’s why I ended up trying ways that seemed too good to be true. I got sucked into courses where I was promised it was easy to make money. These marketers know exactly what to say and what buttons to push to get us to buy.

All the ways I had tried to make money were not interesting to me. I was just interested in making money as soon as possible. When I tried for a month and saw little or no results, I would give up. I lacked patience. This happened over and over again. Since the ways to make money were not interesting, I had no motivation to keep trying.

I said this time I knew I needed to do things differently if I wanted different results. This is why I didn’t jump into whatever money making opportunity came my way. I knew that strategy hadn’t worked for me. This time I focused on improving myself first.

I had to become the type of person that would get results in life, achieve my goals, and be a successful entrepreneur online.

I changed my habits. I read books. In the car instead of just listening to the radio, I listened to personal development CDs I borrowed from the library. I had a morning routine. I practice gratitude. I sold my Xbox video game system so I wouldn’t waste time playing video games. I watched less TV.

I was online researching ideas. I came across people who were making money online and reading their articles. I began listening to podcasts.

All these changes better prepared me when I decided to start this blog in January 2011 and the same month start development on my first iPhone app called Photo 365. As a person, I was better prepared to handle the rollercoaster ride I was about to embark.

14 month after I had written that letter to myself, I had achieved more than I imagined. I had a thriving blog that people loved. My first app, made $30,000 in the first month thanks to Apple featuring it. I got married. I wrote a short e-book. Here’s a year in review I wrote for 2011 that highlights everything.

It’s all because I stopped doing the same old things and expecting different results. I stopped wanting and hoping for a better life. I took action towards that and I started in the area of my life where I could control first.

So to start to live the best life you can don’t focus first on external goals like finding a job, finding love, or making more money as the key to improving your life and happiness.

Start focusing on what you can control. Start focusing on you. See what you’re feeding your mind. That includes what you read, watch, or listen to on a daily basis. Get out of your comfort zone. Learn new skills or improve existing skills you have.

Take a look at the five people you spend the most time with. Are they the type of people you want to end up like? If not, then you need to distance yourself and find new friends. You can do that through local classes or finding activities through

Get new habits into your life and get rid of bad ones. Rememeber you have to start doing different things if you want to get different results.

The change you want in your life is up to you. You can’t depend on someone coming into your life to change it. No one is going to do it for you. No one is going to save you. It’s up to you and I’ve shared what helped me.

You can start with your health. That’s something you can control. Find an activity you enjoy doing. I like running cause it’s easy. I don’t need a membership or fancy equipment. If you hate running, don’t run. Just go for a brisk walk. Listen to a podcast while you walk. There’s hundreds of ways to get exercise so find what is best for you.

I’ve given you a lot of advice based on my experience. I don’t want you to leave overwhelmed so I’m going to tell you where you should start if you had to just pick one thing. Start with a morning routine. Work on creating your own morning routine which includes gratitude, reading, mediation, some movement, and alone time. Your morning routine is your time. Don’t check e-mail or social media. That can wait till later in the day.

I wish there was a shortcut to success and happiness. For many years, I wanted it to be easy. I hoped so many times that I would wake up feeling like a new man with unlimited motivation and an idea for a business that I could start. I wanted change to happen quickly because I could not stand the life I had. That made me not have patience and also give up on ways to make money online when I wasn’t seeing success quickly.

What you don’t need are top ten life hacks or five ways you can instantly be happy now.

What you have to imagine is that this moment is the new chapter in your life. Forget about the past. Forget about mistakes and regrets. That’s all in the past and nothing can be done about it. Start focusing on each day you’re living. What can you do today to change just a tiny bit?

Creating the type of life you want isn’t going to happen overnight. It’s not going to happen in a week or even a month, but I guarantee that in the next 12 months you can make huge changes in your life. You can achieve more than you imagined in just 12 months. I can say that confidently because I did.

You have to take 100% responsibility for your life first. The only person that is going to change your life is the one you see in the mirror every day. You have to stop making excuses and blaming everyone and everything around you.

I’ve given you my best advice on how to start. It’s up to you to decide what your next move will be. Will it be going back to your old life, old ways, and ignoring everything you just read? Or are you willing to do whatever it takes, try new things, have an open mind, and take it one day at a time?

That is up to you to decide.

Five years ago I stood here at the same stand up desk in the exact same place in my office. I opened up my laptop after yet another long and stressful night at work and typed a letter to myself. I called it my manifesto. It was a letter to tell myself basically to stop making excuses, stop wasting my life, and do something about everything I always complained about in my life.

I taped two copies and put one right above my computer on the wall, where it still is, and one on my bathroom mirror, which isn’t there anymore. I knew if I put it in those two places, I would definitely see it every day. I wanted it to be a reminder of how I felt that night and what I told myself.

Five years later a lot in my life has changed:

What I’m most proud of is that I made all of this happen.

I didn’t just wake up one day and got lucky. I decided to take control of my life instead of just hoping it would get better. It hasn’t always been easy. I’ve had ups and downs for sure, but I can look back at these last five years and feel proud.

I needed to stop doing what I did before in order to get different results. I figured I had nothing to lose to try. Life could not get any worse than how it was in my eyes.

Looking back these past five years, I thought about the biggest lessons I’ve taken away that will help you.

Let go of the past

If you’re holding a lot of baggage from your past, you have to find ways to let it go. By holding grudges or constantly thinking back about mistakes you made in the past, you can’t move forward.

What you’re doing is thinking about the past and getting so angry about it that is paralyzes you. You can’t get anything done. You can’t focus on the present. All you can do is think about things that happened in the past.

Don’t beat yourself up if you feel like you’ve wasted the last five or ten years or your life. You can’t get that time back. You can’t go back and do things differently.

What you can absolutely do is learn from your mistakes and your regrets so that you don’t make the same mistakes again moving forward.

It might help if you write a letter to yourself to let go of that anger you’re holding on to. Then after you write it, burn the letter or rip it to shreds. Often times, you hold in everything that’s been bothering you and you have no one to talk to about it. Get it off your chest so that you can start focusing on what you can do every day to create the type of life you want.

I could have been angry with myself for wasting my 20’s and getting nowhere in life. I could have replayed every decision that led me to where I was and wished I could have done it differently.

I decided to not focus on the past because I had for so many years. Doing so felt like a punch in the gut every time. It would leave me weak and in pain. Not helpful when trying to change.

I had to let it go in order to move forward in life.

If you want different results, you have to do different things. 

If you don’t want your future to look like your past, you can’t keep doing the same old s**t. Re-read that to really let it sink in. You can’t keep doing what you have been doing and expect life to miraculously get better.

You can’t keep going to your lousy job, complain to whoever will listen about it, and watch TV four hours every night and expect a new job with a better salary to be waiting for you when you check Facebook for the one hundredth time that day.

I’ll save you time and tell you it’s not going to happen.

You’re not going to attract the man or woman of your dreams by continuously thinking of yourself failure in life and staying at home every weekend and having a pity party for one.

You’re not going to improve your marriage, lose that weight, or start a side business, by doing what you have been doing up until this point.

What you have been doing has gotten you to this exact moment. Is that where want to be? Are you happy about it?

If you want different results, you have to find a different strategy because I can guarantee if you keep doing that, five years from now, you’re going to be the same person in the same situation. The only difference will be your age.

In 2005, I was in a job I hated. In 2010, I was still in a job I hated. Why? Because I kept doing the same thing. I wasn’t taking much action. I spent my nights after work on the computer and watching TV. On my days off, I’d do the same. I rarely went out.

I kept focusing on how much I hated my life. I kept holding the same beliefs in my head like maybe it’s not possible. I kept thinking of the quickest way to make a lot of money. I kept feeling sorry for myself.

That all had to stop!

In 2015, I do work that I choose to do and I’m making more money now than at my job. All because I started doing things differently in my life.

Some of the things I did were start a gratitude journal, filled my mind with clean water, started a morning routine, set goals, and exercise. I didn’t do them just for one day or one week. I did them consistently.

I never did any of those things before. When I began to make them a part of my life, then I started to see serious changes. I was getting results I had never gotten before.

Continue Reading…

To get from where you are now, to where you want to be, there will have to be sacrifices that you must make.

Making sacrifices is something we all wish we didn’t have to do. Can’t we get six pack abs and still eat anything we want every day? Can’t we have a successful online business that allows us to quit our job without giving up watching TV four hours every night after work?

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. Despite how badly many people want change in their life, they’re unwilling to make the necessary sacrifices to get it.

Achieving goals does not come without making sacrifices. Making positive changes in your life doesn’t come without giving up something.

Let’s go over some of the sacrifices you will have to make if you want to achieve your goals and make changes in your life.

Comfort Zone

This is an important one so I’m going to mention it first.

You have to become comfortable with being uncomfortable. For too long, you’ve lived in your comfort zone, and that’s why you now feel stuck in life. You’re not growing. You’ve stopped learning. You have the same habits and thoughts. They’re slowly killing you on the inside.

You’re afraid the unknown. You’re afraid to fail. You’re afraid to make mistakes. You’re afraid you will look stupid.

You have to stop feeling safe because being where you are right now isn’t brining you what you want in life.


The average person watches 4 hours of TV a day. That’s 28 hours a week. In a 65 year life, that person will have spent 9 years watching TV.

Yet the average person complains about not having time to do anything else.

If this is you, you need to cut back on watching TV. I’m not suggesting you give it up completely, but figure out what you want to watch and record it. That way when you watch it later, you can fast forward through the commercials further saving you more time.

The biggest problem is when you mindlessly watch TV. You’re channel surfing to find something remotely interesting to watch.

Those hours watching TV means no time to start that business, write that book, spend time with family, or go to the gym.

At the end of your life are you going to wish you had watched less mindless TV? Yes you will. You will wished you had done something productive with all that time you had.

The Internet

It’s a powerful resource, but it’s also a rabbit hole. You can spend a couple hours easily going from one link to the next. You’re doing anything to distract yourself. You’re just wasting time.

Don’t complain that you aren’t happy with your life, but spend hours every day on the internet.

The internet can be a great resource. Reading articles like this one that benefit you is great. Reading interviews about successful people inspires you. There are articles on any topic you want to learn more about.

You’ll have to give up mindlessly clicking from link to link, watching endless Youtube videos, and being a zombie just staring at your screen.


If you want more time in the day, then you might have to sacrifice an extra hour or two of sleep.

The mornings are the best time to get things done. You’re awake before anyone else in your house is. It’s quiet and free from distractions. You can use that time to go through your morning routine, go exercise, or work on your side business.

Need help getting up early and not hitting the snooze button all morning? Sleep earlier, make sure your bedroom is at a cool temperature, no electronic devices an hour before bed, and no caffeine after 2pm.


You have to know that everyone who is successful now were beginners at one point. They went through growing pains and made stupid mistakes. They likely failed on their first, second, and third attempt.

It won’t be a smooth ride. You’re going to make mistakes. You’re going to have doubts along the way.

If you’re waiting to learn as much as you can so that everything will go perfectly, then you will never start and you will never finish. Because I guarantee it won’t go as planned and when you encounter your first obstacle, you will easily give up because you expected everything to go perfectly.

Give up being perfect.

How to not make any sacrifices

You can do so by staying the way you are. You don’t do anything different. Everything in your life is comfortable. But with comfort comes a feeling of unhappiness, restlessness, disappointment, and frustration. You have a desire to do more in life. You badly want to turn your life around.

It’s not happening because you haven’t been willing to make the sacrifices needed.

Nothing comes easy.

Nothing comes without making sacrifices in your life.

I don’t understand it when people think it’s too late to make changes in their life and start living their life the way they want.

Is there a rule that I missed that says after we reach a certain age, that we’re stuck with our life the way it is?

Someone who’s 35 might feel like it’s too late while another person is 55 and feel it’s too late. That just proves that it doesn’t matter your age. It’s your perception.

Don’t you think the person who’s 55 will wish they were 35? They’ll wish they could go back 20 years and go after their dreams or change how their life is.

Thinking it’s too late to get a life that you want is one of the biggest myths holding you back in life.

The only time it is too late to do anything is when you’re physically not here anymore. Until then, don’t waste this only chance at life that you have.

If I compared myself to my friends, I was way behind. By the time we turned, 30 they had good jobs, got married, and even had kids. I was lost, confused, lonely, and unhappy.

I’ve always been a late bloomer. I didn’t get married till I was 34. I didn’t achieve my dream of being my own boss till I was 36. I’m 37 and still don’t have kids yet.

Do I wish I was 27 and living the life I am now? Absolutely, but when I was 27 I was still young and naive about life. I didn’t know what I know now.

When I turned 30, reality hit me. I had nothing to show for in life. I was unhappier at 30 than when I was 20. It wasn’t supposed to be like that. Instead of giving up, I made a promise to myself that my 30’s would be the best decade yet. I still have three years till 40, but I’ve done a pretty good job so far.

I could have thought I’m a loser at 30 for not knowing what I want to do in life. I could have continued to feel sorry for myself and wish I could go back and do things differently.

Sure there are some limitation as to when it’s too late to do something. If it requires physical talents like being a world class tennis player or soccer player, then it’s too late. It doesn’t mean I can’t start to learn how to play tennis or soccer. I could still find ways to compete.

If I wanted to learn the guitar and be good enough to perform, I could start to learn now at the age of 37. If I practiced just 30 minutes a day for a year, I would improve so much.

A guy went from a recreational table tennis to being ranked in the top 250 in England after playing every day for a year (see the video). What could you achieve if you did something every single day?

Other than physical limitations, most everything else has no expiration date. Who says you can’t go back to college now and get a degree? Just because your classmates could be old enough to be your child doesn’t mean you can’t go back.

Who says you can’t be an actor at any age? Watch movies and television shows, and you’ll see actors of all ages.

Do you have a book inside of you that you’ve wanted to write? Nobody wonders how old the author is being buying a book. In fact, nowhere inside of the book reveals the author’s age.

Want to start your own business? I read somewhere once that the older you are when you start your business, the better the chance of it succeeding. The reason is because of many more years of work experience. You’ve made mistakes in the past. You’ve had success in other areas. I also think there’s a different mentality. The older you are willing to work harder to make be successful. If you’re young, you think if it doesn’t work, you’ve still got more chances to try again.

Want to make a career change? Why can’t you? You have experience in one career that your next employer would probably appreciate more than a recent college graduate who’s only learned from the book.

If you can’t find the career you want, why not create it? We live in a time when companies empower people to write bestselling books, be a Youtube celebrity, make money selling handmade goods, or even sell t-shirts without any design experience or inventory.

Again it’s the mentality that you’re supposed to have everything in your life figured out by a certain age. Once you choose, you can’t change.

Stop thinking that way.

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Lifestyle choices.
I don’t know you. We may have never talked, but there’s something I know about you.

You are where you are right now in your life from the choices you’ve made up to this point. It’s not cause of luck or bad luck as you may think. Your life is the result of the series of choices you’ve made up to this point in your life.

Before you read this, you made choices. Some were made automatically like brushing your teeth. Other choices you had to think about like what you were going to do when you got on the computer or what you ate.

It took me 32 years to realize my choices shaped my life. I thought my life was just full of bad luck. I wasn’t getting the results I wanted and I didn’t know why.

How could I turn my luck around? Well, it wasn’t by making the same choices. I needed to make better ones.

It’s not just one choice

It’s not going to take one major choice. When you put together a series of choices, they create momentum and results, that will determine the results you get.

Every time you make a choice, you’re either getting closer to your goal or further away. The immediate effect might be so tiny; you won’t notice a difference.

For example, if you have that piece of cake, it’s steering you closer to gaining weight. It’s not much, but you’ve taken a tiny step in that direction. On the other hand, if you pass on the piece of cake, you’re taking a step in the other direction.

The choice to eat cake won’t have a big immediate impact in the short run, but now multiply each choice by 365 days and after a year you will have gained weight or lost weight.

That’s why I never understood why people would sue McDonald’s for making them fat. Yes, their food is unhealthy, and if you eat it for 30 days straight, it can nearly kill you. However, they didn’t make them eat it! It was their choice. They decided to order the food, pay for it, and eat it. No one else chose that meal for them. Even if they have no choice but to eat there, they have healthier options available. They don’t have to get fries and a big Coke. No one put a gun to their head.

They stupidly want to blame McDonald’s.

My wife and I watch a show called My 600 Pound Journey. It takes place over 2-3 years and follows individuals as they try and go from 600+ pounds to around 200 pounds.

I couldn’t believe someone could get to 600 pounds. How did they get there? By the choices, they made for many years. What I liked about a recent episode is that two of the people took responsibility for it. They didn’t blame genetics. They didn’t say the rest of their family is big, so that’s why they’re big. They knew they made horrible choices. I just don’t know how they could get to 600+ pounds before deciding they needed help.

The same power of choices helped them lose enough weight to be able to get the stomach stapling surgery. Even after that it required healthy eating and being active to continue to lose weight. These were choices they had to make. Did they want to die at a young age or make the right choices to have a normal life again?

Even after two years they still had to make sure they continued to the make the right choices. Making the wrong ones for too long would soon have the momentum carry them back towards gaining weight.

I’m sure they could indulge like a cookie after lunch or pizza for dinner one night. Making that choice doesn’t mean they’ll lose everything they worked hard for, but choosing pizza more often than choosing a side of steamed vegetables and a 4oz baked chickens mean in the long run, the weight will come back.

That’s why one small choice won’t make or break you. Some choices like, drinking and driving, can have massive consequences. What I’m talking about deciding to be lazy tonight and watch TV or eating a large pizza in one sitting. Doing it 20% of the time isn’t

What choices will you make?

Every second, you make choices. You made a choice to read this right now. You’re choosing to continue reading. After you finish this, you will choose what you want to do next.

Tonight at home after a long day at work, you have the choice to decide what you will do. Will you sit on the couch and watch TV until it is bedtime? Will you spend an hour working on your business, spend thirty minutes going for a walk or run, or do whatever it is that you know you need to be doing?

It’s up to you. I can only make you aware of the power that little tiny choices have in the long run. You have to decide on a consistent basis what you will do. I promise if you make the right choices consistently, then you’re going to start seeing some amazing results.

Story of success

You have a story. I have a story. Everyone has a story. Some are willing to talk about their story while others are ashamed to let anyone know.

A good story is what makes a movie interesting. A common story is the hero’s journey. It’s starting from humble beginnings and by the end of the movie this hero has risen to greatness. It’s why Luke Skywalker and Harry Potter are such great characters. In a sense, we can relate to them. We want to be like them, minus getting our hand chopped off by Darth Vader, who we didn’t realize was our father.

We want a story that we’re proud about.

I’m not happy with feeling like I wasted much of my 20’s lost and feeling stuck in life. Those were important years that I can’t get back and do again. However, I didn’t want my struggles in my 20’s and even early 30’s to be my story. I didn’t want my story to be of a person who didn’t get busy living.

I have a story now that makes me proud. I overcame being stuck in a job I hated, had no direction in life, and now have created a better version of myself to along with a new career.

My story would be boring and less relatable if I grew up in a mansion, went to an Ivy League school, got a bunch of fancy degrees and found success in every single job I did. Making an app or sell t-shirts online wouldn’t be as interesting because you would see a guy who’s never failed. You would think I’m super smart, and never have to worry about how I’m going to pay the bills while starting an online business since I come from a rich family. You wouldn’t be able to relate at all. You would have stopped reading my blog a long time ago.

Because I was a regular guy, in a situation many of you can relate to, you get more inspiration out of it.

That’s what helped me realize that my dreams were not impossible. I found people online who were doing what I wanted. I could relate to them because they were just regular people with normal lives and because of various circumstances started all over again at the bottom when they began making money online.

Super successful people have also started from rock bottom. I love J.K. Rowling’s story because she wrote Harry Potter after a divorce and was raising a young child. She wrote on an old typewriter in a cafe. She did this after having a normal life and career, but after hitting rock bottom she figured she had nothing to lose so why not do what she really wanted to do. That’s the kind of story I love.

How many people would be in that situation and give up on life? Probably most, but she didn’t.

It’s hard for me to find inspiration from the people who have success because it was handed to them. I can’t relate to them. I’m sure you will agree.

This year I reflected and realized I’m glad I have a story. I didn’t like that life sucked for so long, but I’m proud to show off my scars. Fortunately, others have found my story to be interesting and have been invited on podcasts to talk about it. I want to share that time I fell of the e-scooter while riding through town. It was really fun to use, but not when a car gets in your way and you have to steer off onto the sidewalk and hit a tree. Honestly the e-scooter was the best one anybody can have, it goes super fast and the battery last really long.

But without the struggle early on, my story would be a lot less relatable to you. It’d be a story nobody would want to hear.

The biggest compliment I can get is when someone reads my story and then afterward thinks “If Benny can do it, so can I.” I want you to feel like you can do it.

You can change your life around. You can leave an unfulfilling job. You can find love and happiness.

Your story up to this point may not be what you imagined five years or even one year ago. You had hopes and dreams but things happened, and you are where you are now. Why not start today to create the future that you want? You just agreed you couldn’t have imagined life would be like this. So remove those doubt that you can achieve your goals. Five years from now you could be saying to yourself you would have never imagined life would be like this, but in a positive way.

Five years ago, I couldn’t believe that my life was how it was. I didn’t imagine that after ten years after college, I’d still have no idea what I wanted to do in life.

Five years ago if you told me I would have made six figures online selling t-shirts, I would have thought that would be like winning the lottery. It sounded cool, but doubtful it’d happen to me. Now I can say it has happened, and it feels much more amazing because I remember the years and years I struggled.

If your life isn’t the way you want it to be, you can’t go back in time and change anything. Instead, you can decide that you want to improve your story. Prove to yourself that you can and will achieve your goals and become the a person you’re proud of.

You can use the frustration that comes from being in your current situation as fuel. You can decide you want to prove wrong those who have always doubted you.

I want you to write a story that makes you smile. I want you to finally walk with your head held high.

It’s a story that you can be proud of because despite hitting rock bottom, you found a way to do it.

That’s a story that will be passed down from generation to generation.