Today’s topic is going to be about one of our biggest enemy: failure. The truth is many people would rather die than face any failure. They would rather go to their grave with feelings of regret, than take a risk, follow their dream because they are afraid to fail.
Failure doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It’s not the end of the world, but a lot of people believe that.
People want perfection. They expect the first business they start to be the big one, or the first book they write to be a bestseller. They don’t want to be rejected. They don’t want to hear people say they think it’s the dumbest idea they’ve ever heard. They are afraid to hear the word no.
All this imagining goes on before they even begin. It’s all in their mind. It scares them so they never begin. They’d rather play it safe.
Even if they do begin, they’re so scared of failing that they don’t try that hard. They aren’t giving it their full effort.Then when they inevitably fail, they’ll say to themselves, “see I knew I’d screw up again”.
Maybe they’ve failed before and that memories is still fresh .
No one wants to hear the word “no”. But how many no’s are you willing to hear until you get your first yes? some people stop after the first no. Maybe some will stop after the 3rd. Some never even make an attempt.
Would you believe someone heard the word no 1009 times until he got a yes? It’s true.
I’m going to share with you a list of famous people that most of us know who have changed history, but all heard the word no or failed before they found success.
You might feel stuck, but you’re unsure why. I’ve listed 12 behaviors that are possibly holding you back from where you are now to where you want to be.
You can start to make changes now. Stop denying yourself from becoming the type of person you truly want to become. Get rid of the old you, and start allowing the real you to come through.
You need to stop…
1. Being too safe – No pain, no gain. Playing it safe gets you nowhere in life. You want to play it safe because you’re so afraid of failure. By being too safe, you don’t even try. You don’t see what’s can possibly happen.
To reach your full potential, the road will be bumpy. It’s intentionally that way to find out who wants it the most. The weak ones get left behind, while the risk takers forge ahead and see what’s further down the road. That’s where happiness is. Where there is happiness there will be success as well.
2. Doubting your own dreams. – It doesn’t matter what your dream is. It could be starting a business, writing a book, finding love, or something else. The first thing you have to do is believe in yourself. Don’t seek validation from others. Believing in yourself might be hard because you’re just beginning, but you have to believe in what you’re doing without seeing the whole road in front of you.
3. Being influenced by negative people – You cannot be a positive person if you’re surrounded with negativity all the time. Sometimes these people are long time friends, but they’ve decided to take their life in a different direction than you want. Usually it’s no direction. It’s not a healthy relationship anymore. If someone isn’t adding any value you to your life, it’s best to say goodbye.
4. Expecting everything to be easy. – Stop expecting life is going to be a smooth ride. It’s not. Life is like sailingl across the Atlantic ocean. It’s going to start off real smooth. During the journey there will be huge waves and heavy rains. It’s part of the journey. The person sailing knows that and has to prepare for moments like that. Instead of wanting a life that’s easy, become a person that can handle the choppy waters.
If you remove all struggles from your life, you’re not going to find out what you’re truly made of. Success feels even sweeter when you’ve overcome your struggles and thrived.
5. Letting everyone else decide for your life for you. – You think it’s easier to just let other people decide for you because you don’t know what you want. Maybe you’re afraid of making the wrong choice. If you let people dictate your life, you will live a life that you don’t want.
If I listened to my parents, I’d either be an unhappy doctor or lawyer. Don’t give your life away to others who put you on a path that has no meaning for you.
6. Living in the past. – Would of, could of, should of. There’s moments that you wished you could go back and have a do over. Try not to dwell on the opportunities you missed out. You can’t go back anyways. Keep moving forward and if opportunities comes again, you will be better prepared to take it.
Living in the past guarantees that not have the future you desire.
7. Ignoring the lessons – Everything happens for a reason and you can learn and grow from. When something bad happens, and it will, find the lesson behind it. What could you have done better? What would you do if faced with the same situation in the future?
8. Holding on to resentment. – If you’re carrying baggage from your past, you won’t have room for all the everything else you want. Holding onto resentment, past failures, a broken heart and hate for others is going to keep you living in the past. Let it go so you can finally move forward. You start by writing a letter to yourself.
9. Being too hard on yourself. – If you screw up, give yourself a break. Everyone makes mistakes. When you make a mistake, it’s not the end of the world. So it’s not as bad as you think. Pick yourself up and try again. Nobody is perfect an neither are you.
10. Being so pessimistic. – You often spend way too much time why you’re not good enough, why you don’t deserve to be successful, and why you can’t do it. You waste too much time with that inner voice that won’t shut up. You walk with our head down. It’s time to turn that frown upside down.
Instead of thinking “Why me?” think “Why not me?” Why can’t you be a bestselling author? Why can’t you become an actor? Why can’t you start a million dollar company? If others have done it, why can’t you?
11. Giving up too soon. – Most people give up right before their big breakthrough. Of course they don’t know it’s coming, but they give up too soon. If you choose something you believe in, then go after it with everything you have. Someday all that hard work and sacrifice will come together.
I tried so many different online businesses and failed. When I had unbelievable success with my first app, it looked like an overnight success, but it wasn’t. I never gave up hope that I’d have an online business. I just didn’t know when it would come. I just kept trying something until it worked for me. Because of the struggles I had, I can look back and smile about how resilient I was and didn’t give up on my dream.
In this episode of the Get Busy Living podcast, I talk about a big problem and that problem is many of us want life to be easier. We want change to be easier. We want to lose weight easier. We want to have more confidence easier. We want money to be growing on trees. We want everything to go right.
It’s dangerous to want everything in life to be easier.
Be careful if you ask for an easy life and get it, you may have a life that you don’t like.
I talk about what you can do instead of wishing life was easier. It has to do a lot with you.
I love Stephen’s story because he’s a regular guy who’s struggled so long to form positive habits. One of his big one was exercise. For many years, he’d be motivated to exercise consistently, and always failed.
Frustrated by his failure, he accidentally stared his first mini habit by just doing one push-up. Just one push-up a day! How simple is that? He figured he could not fail by setting a goal of one push-up a day.
From this tiny beginning, he’s now consistently exercise. It’s a part of him. He doesn’t have to wait to be in the mood, or find motivation to go.
He’s also done this with other areas in life like writing. His mini-habit helped him write his first book.
Here is what you will learn in this podcast:
Why motivation is a horrible strategy.
How one pushup a day turned into a regular habit exercise.
The previous Tuesday I released my slot machine game which I called “All Candy Casino Slots”. I just wanted to make a game with a fun theme. We all love candy.
That Sunday I got an email from Apple.com on behalf of King.com LTD, who own Candy Crush. This is what the email said:
On 1/15/2014, we received a notice from King.com Ltd that King.com Ltd believes the app listed below infringes their intellectual property rights. In particular, King.com Ltd believes you are infringing their trademark. Please see their comments below.
C. Developer: Benjamin Hsu
Provider: Benjamin Hsu
App Title: All Candy Casino Slots – Jewels Craze Connect: Big Blast Mania Land
Apple ID: 788815470
Comments from Complainant: We are the owners of CANDY, in the EU, US and elsewhere. The prominent use of our mark by this developer infringes our rights and is likely to lead to consumer confusion and damage to our brand. Please remove this app as soon as possible.
You can reach King.com Ltd through Sophie Hallstrom (email: email@example.com), copied on this email.
We look forward to receiving written assurance that your application does not infringe King.com Ltd’s rights, or that the parties are taking steps to promptly resolve the matter. Please keep us apprised of your progress.
Should you choose to remove your application, (for example, while you make any necessary changes) use the steps provided below.
This had to be a joke, right?
My initial reactions were disbelief, then anger. How could they own the word “candy”? It’s such a common word and the App Store is flooded with so many games with a candy theme and the word candy in the app name.
Candy Crush was not the first candy game. Remember Candyland?
Now they own the word and I can’t use it, nor can others?
I went to a couple Facebook groups I’m a member of with other app developers. I shared the emailed and ask what should I do.
Their reaction was the same as mine. How could they own the word? How could they even be approved for that trademark?
It was ridiculous for them to trademark the word candy.
After re-reading the email many times, it stated that my game led to “consumer confusion”. How? It looked nothing like it. I didn’t copy the candies in their game. There seem to be a gazillion candy games in the App Store. So were they just going after me or everyone else?
I replied back to the contact in the email and nicely stated that I did not not believe my app was causing any confusion. A search of the word “candy” in the App Store brought up a long list of candy themed app. In no way did I believe I was infringing on their trademark.
Got another lovely reply.
Thank you for your email.
As you will know, King.com Ltd develops and produces online, social and mobile games, including the hugely successful “Candy Crush Saga” game. In addition, King owns the trade mark CANDY (CTM 011538147), which covers for example “online gaming, interactive poker, online gambling services; casino services; casino services delivered via the Internet” in class 41.
Your use of CANDY SLOTS in your app icon uses our CANDY trade mark exactly, for identical goods, which amounts to trade mark infringement and is likely to lead to consumer confusion and damage to our brand. The addition of only the descriptive term “SLOTS” does nothing to lessen the likelihood of confusion. You will appreciate that we need to take action where our marks are being used without our consent, with the consequent risk of our marks becoming diluted or damaged in any way or consumers believing that the goods originate from or are otherwise endorsed or approved by us.
We understand that you might not have been aware that this was an infringement. Now that you are aware of your infringements, please amend the name of your App accordingly.
We are aware that there are many games on the app store with CANDY in the name, this is largely due to the popularity of our game Candy Crush Saga. We review each of these apps in turn and take action where necessary.
I hope this helps to answer your questions.
We reserve all rights.
That is absurd. Let’s do a side-by-side comparison.
The word CANDY is about as generic as can be. The candy lollipops aren’t even in their game.