What do you do when life throws a right hook to your face? It can feel like the end of the world. You fail a big test, you don’t get the job you want, you get laid off from your dream job, you partner tells you “we need to talk”.
Plans that you had for your future are gone in an instant.
It happens a lot. Some people never recover from it because they hold on to so much anger about it. They replay the past over and over in their head wondering why it had to happen to them.
While others decide to let it go and begin a new journey that turns out to be even better than the original plan.
That happened to my friend Pat Flynn. He had had his dream job of being an architect. Then the economy went down and people were being laid off. He was one of them.
His whole future was now unknown. The plans he had were all gone. Now he couldn’t find a job.
Fast forward to today and he now has a business that earns upwards of $60,000 a month. He’s loving what he does now. I bet he’s glad he was let go because now life is even more amazing.
He wrote a book talking about his journey. It’s called Let Go (affiliate link) and it’s the story about his dream life being shattered when he was let go by his architectural job.
It’s an inspiring book. If you haven’t read it, I do recommend it.
If you know my story or heard my interviews before, you have heard me mention the blog Pat runs called Smartpassiveincome.com. When I decided to turn my life around towards the end of 2010, I found his blog online. I had no idea who he was, but was impressed with how much he was making per month (around $20,000 at that time) and the content he was putting out. I began to read as much as I could and I also started listening to his podcasts.
One of his podcasts had to do with his iPhone app company that he started with a friend. They didn’t know how to program so they outsourced the work. I didn’t realize I could outsource the work overseas. I thought the only way to develop an app was to program it myself.
So I was inspired by what he was able to do and set out to create my first app, Photo 365. It turned out to be a success.
Let Go of the Past
This wasn’t my first attempt at making money online. Everything up to that point had been a failure. I had to let go of my past failures and realize that didn’t define my potential for future success.
I had to let go of the fact I had wasted so many years of my life. I had to let go of blaming others and pointing fingers. When finally let go of everything that had been holding me back, it was like going from first gear to fifth gear in a sport car.
I’m still having to remind myself to let go.
Last week I wrote about some idiot who left a comment on here saying some stupid things. I replied a couple times, but after his last comment, I stopped replying. I really wanted to get in the last word, but I needed to let go. Otherwise his comments would keep bothering me. I would keep thinking about them. He would probably reply again, and I would think of something to say back to him.
It wasn’t helping me at all.
I had to let go and move on. I decided I’ll let him think he’s the king of the world, which is clearly isn’t, and stop responding to his immaturity.
I shared two stories of women who had to let go of pain and anger from people who physically and emotionally abused them. By writing letters to help let go, they were able to move on with their lives.
You might be holding on to something from your past that’s consuming your mind. Maybe you hold a lot of self doubt in your mind. Maybe it’s a grudge with someone. Maybe it’s your past failures.
Whatever it is you have to find a way to let go. It’s the only way you’re going to be happier, successful, and have peace of mind.
Today is Let Go Day
Pat is doing something really cool with his book Let Go. You may have seen it mentioned on other blogs or see it on social media.
Today is Let Go day. What Pat is doing is hosting a two-hour live Ustream broadcast with himself and some special guests. It begins today, June 17th beginning 12:00PM Pacific / 3:00PM Eastern. They’ll talk about their Let Go stories and share stories from the audience as well.
During the broadcast he’ll be holding a giveaway every 15-20 minutes.
Here are the details in put neatly.
Benny – As always a great post. I have met so many people who have let the past become this huge chip on their shoulder and they let it cause problems both in their business and relationships. I think for some, they use the past as a excuse to not try and get ahead. There is that old saying that yesterday is history and tomorrow is but a dream that’s why we have to live for today. Glad your staying positive. Hope today is a no troll Monday and that goes for the rest of the week. Fortune favors the bold and your one of the boldest cats on the web.
I get a lot of emails from readers who walk around with a lot of baggage. Some stuff that happened years ago. So I hope this post gets at least one person to let go so they can move on. Thanks Paul for the comment!
As for letting go of anger for wasting so many years, I prefer to think of bad times as a necessary part of the human experience. Don’t just let go of the anger. Embrace it and realize the bad times play an important role in shaping who you are as a person. A friend of mine likes to say, “Nothing ever goes wrong in my life.” Even though he’s had some really hard times, everything that’s happened in his life has led to the present moment, who he is right now, and he wouldn’t have it any other way. Without those “wasted” years, Benny, you wouldn’t be as awesome as you are now, and you wouldn’t be able to appreciate your current life as much. Keep it up!
Thanks so much for your comment Chaki! You made some great points.
Nice post. I’ve been bullied in school and the pain and emotions from that took a long time to dim. Carrying too much from the past can be damaging and keep you from moving forward. But time goes on and you eventually start thinking about it less and less, feel it less and less and only tell the tale to share wisdom. You learn from it. You grow from it. And yes, you eventually heal from it. Funnily enough, I had a run in with one of the girls who bullied me just a couple days ago and would you think it would bring up the same emotions? It didn’t! It made me remember things, yes, but I didn’t feel the same way. I just know I was there to eat a nice meal and she couldn’t bother me. That she didn’t bother me anymore 🙂 It was quite an interesting and courageous moment for me.
Sorry you were bullied in school. That’s another thing I don’t understand why people do it, but glad to hear you didn’t let running into her affect you! That is a huge step. You were in control of the situation and you did what you wanted, which was to not let it bother you. Thanks for sharing.
Great post Benny and I’m glad you let go. Negative people and opinions you didn’t ask for are something we often focus on for no good reason at all! And you’re WAAAAY too good to let others bring you down when you’re getting on and busy living.
Thank you Natalie! It was a good lesson for me to ignore what stupid people say because it doesn’t do me any good. See you soon!
I think the first part of relinquishing the power we give something else is recognizing that we are viewing ourselves as the victim in a situation.
This doesn’t mean that throughout life we aren’t victimIZED, but we sure as hell are never at the mercy anything else. So it’s not that the [insert your thing here] is holding you back – it’s how you’re feeling about and the power you’re giving to [that thing] that seems to be holding you back. Which ultimately means it’s you. Duh.
Ballin’ post Benny!
Great point! You totally right. It’s always about us. It’s not anything else holding us back but us and what is going on in our mind. We decide we’re the victim, but can also decide to be free from it.
I bought and loved Let Go too! Recently I let go quite a bit. I wasn’t confident about myself or my writing so I hid behind my Buck Rodgers logo. I finally replaced him with my own picture and recently put up my first YouTube video. Please swing by when you are free. I know you’re a busy man these days with your iPhone app empire. Thanks!
Great to hear from you! Man it was awesome to see your face finally. You were awesome in front of the camera. Total pro doing that interview. Glad to hear you’re not hiding anymore. You have nothing to hide really and people definitely connect with the person behind the blog. Thanks for letting me know!
Someone once told me that if you didn’t have the down times you couldn’t appreciate the good times. i think there is some truth to that. Just realize that there will always be both. It’s what you make of it that matters.
I agree Bennie, it’s extremely important to let go of the past. Every day presents a new opportunity to achieve our goals.
Now is always great time to let it go 🙂